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who can help me to correct the task 2 writting.thx.
 
claire66
Posted: 06 August 2009 05:49 AM   [ Ignore ]  
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International tourism is now more common than ever before . some feel that this Is a positive trend ,while others do not.
What are your opinions on this?


It is a trend that the international tourism becomes more and more popular.The reason for it is that every countries opens their doors and the citizen have more money travel oversea.i believe that the international tourism can effect on the host countries and tourists opetively.two of the primary advantages associated with this trend are as follows.
First of all,the global tourism can communicate the different culture between various countries.since the transport is poor,many years ago,only can few people travel abroad.now,the transport develop quickly,it has the potential to bring about great advances for travel oversea and let the humankinds meet different cultule.so the international tourism does have the benefit for foster grater understanding and tolerance between people of different culture .meanwhile,we can through the global tourism learn something ,such as the awareness of the environment’protection in the develop countries.
  Moreover,the international tourism has brought the undeniable economic prosperty to many host countries.one particularly salient example of the developing countries like Thailand that its main economi resource is tourism.it attractives thousands of tourists from countries to custom for its special local conditions and customs .at the same time,the others industry,such as rag trade,get developed ,too.
  Although some people believe that the international tourism has been negative ,this is resulted from environmental degradation,I still convinted that benefit bring from global tourism is more important than the drawbacks. And the problem of environment by communication of the culture.

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Tester Extra
Posted: 06 August 2009 11:24 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 1 ]  
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Hi Claire,

I’m afraid that the iPass team do not correct writing tasks as a free service. We do, however, provide a correction service for a fee of €10 per writing task. This includes detailed and professional feedback, advice on which areas you need to improve, two sample answers, plus tips on how to answer similar questions.

For an example of our expert analysis go to:

http://www.ipass.uk.net/index.php/ipass/sample_writing/

You can choose an iPass writing task here:

http://www.ipass.uk.net/index.php/offers/

However, I’m happy to give you some free advice n the writing task you’ve submitted:

POSITIVE THINGS

You have organised your ideas well into clearly defined paragraphs and your position is consistent throughout (you are in favour of international tourism).

You have used relevant examples to support your argument and included a personal reference to your own country.

You have used some excellent examples of language: (it has the potential to bring about great advances for travel) 

THINGS TO IMPROVE

Some of your sentences are poorly structured which makes them difficult to read: (since the transport is poor,many years ago,only can few people travel abroad)

There are lots of spelling and punctuation mistakes.

OVERALL

Your basic structure and use of language to express your ideas is very good. Now you need to work on your accuracy which will give you a significantly higher grade.

Keep practising! Hope this helps!

The iPass Team

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claire66
Posted: 06 August 2009 11:48 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 2 ]  
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Total Posts:  3
Joined  2009-02-18

i am glad that you can help me.i have another question,in your opinion,what mark i get.

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Tester Extra
Posted: 06 August 2009 12:20 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 3 ]  
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Again, we don’t give out exact band scores on Ipass. Instead we give a corresponding comment for each criteria based on this answer key:

0-3   Weak
4-5   Satisfactory
6-7   Good
8-9   Very strong

In your case, I would award the following:

Task Achievement - Good
Cohesion & Coherence - Satisfactory
Lexical Resource - Good
Grammatical Range & Accuracy - Satisfactory

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claire66
Posted: 06 August 2009 04:04 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 4 ]  
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Joined  2009-02-18

thx

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